'' 'I am unhappy. I don't know what I want. I suppose my life is too good to keep me satisfied.' It's the common problem of western civilized manhood.''
Or the seventy-six thousendth essay on how to live a happy life
I recently had the sensation that earlier or later, I quit all the things in life that make me happy. Even if I don't quit, they sometimes as well get out of my hands without my action. By all means, this feels quite unsatisfying.
I have thus had great thinking on why this occurs. A major part of it is surely made up by the amazing ability of the human mind to forget unpleasant things and idealize the pleasant memories. However, this is not the end of the story. There must be more about myself getting stuck in corners of my life I had never planned to cross in the first place.
What I could extract after a while of turning many methaphorical stones was that I never knew exactly what I had by a certain thing when I quit it. I also never knew exactly why I quit it. Mostly, I just felt uncomfortable contiuing. My conclusion had to be that obviously, I should not decide on grounds of feelings. Subsequently, the remaining mean of decision is to rationality. But how to decide rational? You firstly need to know what you have. Secondly, what you want. Especially the second part of the problem seemed way out of my determination abilities.
The result I deducted from this was that it is impossible for me to make a decision that makes me happy. If it is not by sheer luck, it will never improve my situation in life. So if I do not want to take (probably minimal) chances, I have to stay entirely passive in my life, in order not to make myself unhappy. Naturally, I cannot improve either but this is a flaw I am ready to accept.
Having come to this unsettling conclusion, I at least have a key to avoid bad decisions: don't make any at all.